Worst morning workout ever

Ok, let it be known that I don’t like morning workouts, aside from waking up on Saturday for long runs during half-marathon training. Those are fine. But run-of-the-mill, weekday workouts before work? NOPE.

 

I vowed not to see Star Wars for at least seven days and so I ordered the book instead


I woke up at 4:30 today, couldn’t fall back to sleep because I was panicking about my big chop, so finally around 5:15, I just figured I’d go to the gym, get to work early, then get to leave early to go home and read the Star Wars Episode VII that Amazon promised was to be dropped off today. (yes I ordered the novelization of the movie WHATEVER)

So I arrive at the gym around 5:40 and start my workout. A simple, 30 minute Nike Training Club workout. Easy peasy. No. It was immediately terrible. I somehow chose a workout that was ALL JUMPING, which isn’t fun to do at 5:45 in the morning – or ever.

I was also very hungry. I’d had an early dinner last night, around 6, then nothing else after. So I had no fuel in my tank. After several minutes of jumping to and fro and lifting things and swinging around weights over my head, I was so light-headed I thought I was going to pass out. My throat even became raspy, which hasn’t happened to me since I was on obese high-schooler in gym class 😦

I muddled my way through the workout, relieved that it finished just in time for another girl to show up and start doing some variation of push up. Whatever, do your thing girl. I’m done!

I went to the locker room and the first thing I saw was some stranger’s naked butt and what was maybe her maxi pad.

Ugh.

I took a shower, all the while two ladies talked about some sort of MAJOR chemical spill/hazard that had just happened on the sixth floor of the building I was currently in. (I work at the IU School of Medicine so there are labs throughout) The lady said all her kids had gotten sick and thrown up from it? They were laughing like it was NBD.

So I get out of the shower and start to get dressed for work and realized I HADN’T BROUGHT ANY SHOES. I only had gym shoes. At this point, there were more naked butts and some lady was asking me if I’d dropped a rubber band (she meant hair tie) and someone in one of the stalls was farting and both of the sinks were taken and I was like I’M GONE. On the way home, I realized this was probably the New Year’s Resolution crowd. THE WORST.

So I went back home (luckily I only live about 5 minutes from work), took ANOTHER shower because I felt gross after naked stranger butts, foreign maxi pads and stall farts, got dressed in a different outfit and still got into work uber early… where I spent the entire day HUNGRY and tired.

I try 6 am workouts every now and then, but it never works out. I think I’ll just accept that (besides running) morning workouts are not my jam — if for no other reason than I don’t want to start my day by looking at other people’s butts and maxi pads and making conversation about rubber bands with naked strangers.

 

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